Welcoming the New Year with Intention, Not Pressure
As the new year approaches, many of us feel pressure to set goals: exercise more, be more productive, fix what feels broken. While goals can be motivating, they often come with rigid expectations and an unspoken belief that we must achieve something to be worthy or successful. For many people—especially those who have experienced burnout, trauma, or chronic stress—this mindset can feel discouraging rather than empowering.
An alternative approach is setting intentions.
Goals vs. Intentions: What’s the Difference?
Goals are outcome-focused. They ask, What do I want to accomplish?
Intentions are value-focused. They ask, How do I want to be?
For example:
A goal might be: “I will work out five days a week.”
An intention might be: “I want to care for my body with curiosity and compassion.”
Research shows that values-based living—acting in alignment with what matters most to us—supports greater psychological flexibility and well-being, even when outcomes are uncertain or imperfect [1]. Intentions allow space for humanity, adaptability, and self-compassion, rather than success-or-failure thinking.
Why Intentions Can Be More Sustainable
They reduce shame and all-or-nothing thinking.
When goals aren’t met, people often internalize this as personal failure. Intentions shift the focus from “Did I succeed?” to “Did I show up with awareness?”—a far more forgiving metric [2].They align with nervous system regulation.
High-pressure goal setting can activate stress responses. Intentions, particularly when grounded in values and compassion, support emotional regulation and resilience [3].They support long-term change.
Sustainable change is more likely when behavior is connected to intrinsic motivation rather than external pressure. Intentions reinforce why something matters, not just what should be done [4].
How to Set Intentions for the New Year
Instead of making a long list of resolutions, consider reflecting on these questions:
What do I want more of in my inner world this year?
How do I want to relate to myself when things are hard?
What values do I want to guide my choices?
From there, you might create intentions such as:
“I intend to respond to myself with kindness rather than criticism.”
“I intend to prioritize rest as a form of care, not something I earn.”
“I intend to stay connected to what matters, even when I feel stuck.”
Intentions don’t require perfection. You can return to them again and again, especially when life doesn’t go as planned.
Living Your Intentions Day to Day
Intentions become meaningful through gentle practice:
Pair them with brief check-ins (e.g., “What would this intention look like right now?”).
Use them as anchors during difficult moments.
Revisit and revise them as your needs change.
Rather than asking the new year to transform you, intentions invite you to meet yourself where you are—and move forward with purpose.
References
Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K. D., & Wilson, K. G. (2012). Acceptance and Commitment Therapy: The Process and Practice of Mindful Change. Guilford Press.
Neff, K. (2011). Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself. William Morrow.
Porges, S. W. (2011). The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-Regulation. W. W. Norton & Company.
Ryan, R. M., & Deci, E. L. (2017). Self-Determination Theory: Basic Psychological Needs in Motivation, Development, and Wellness. Guilford Press.
